out_totheblack (out_totheblack) wrote,
out_totheblack
out_totheblack

NaNo Project

It's snippet day over at squidathon. I've posted a bit of my NaNo project (only lightly edited)

I'd like some feed back on this.  I'm trying to stay in Ben's POV and at the same time show the effects of being moon struck through someone else eyes.  I'm not sure if I've wandered into Rendy's POV by doing that.

Is it okay? How could I make it better?
squid snippet
Tags: nano 2011
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